Destiny Players Own Margbloss In Magpie Raid In Under Two Hours


A team of Destiny players called Deepkill completed the impossible this weekend by defeating the Margbloss in the Magpie raid in one hour and 56 minutes.

If you’re familiar with the Magpie then you know how hard it is to complete the raid, let alone in under two hours. Part of the challenge of this raid is the possibility that a Margbloss could show up at any minute to thwart the best efforts of the party. A Margbloss is a particularly gruesome character in that if you can’t field its rays with your Milptheed weapons before it spawns its Needle Harp then your team is sent back to the entrance minus one Carpac.

Most teams take the long way around the Margbloss lair by cutting through the swarms of Silkbutters on the outer rings of the cave. This takes the crew out of harms way but adds an extra thirty minutes to the completion time which lowers the amount of XP, DigiCur, AP and BuffP rewarded for completion.

What Deepkill figured out is if you are able to kill the Margbloss first, it teleports you to the end of the raid for an instant win. The team devised a plan to attack from all sides using nothing but Thraxxers which choked the Margbloss and stopped it from unleashing its Thrypquills.

The entire run has been posted to Deepkill’s Youtube page.

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Console Cheaters Exposed After Hackers Access ZeldaAran Hookup Site


UPDATE: This news story has been updated., a website for Xbox One and PS4 trolls to secretly play Nintendo products, has been hacked and had its data posted online. The breach was confirmed in a statement by ZeldaAran:

“We apologize for this (sort of) unprovoked intrusion on our customers’ information.”

ZeldaAran’s slogan is “Troll hard. Play hard.” Users can sign up for the service which puts them in contact with Nintendo console owners to set up meeting times to play exclusive Nintendo games. Anonymity is key.

“Our trolls normally spend most of their day badmouthing Nintendo and it’s customers,” said Jeam Melon, CEO of ZeldaAran. “It’s imperative that their online reputations aren’t tarnished by a little pixel tryst every once in awhile.”

Link’s Crusade, the team behind the hack, have posted an unusually short manifesto to their site demanding that ZeldaAran shut down or they’ll release the rest of their information. The entire post is as follows:

“ZeldaAran must shut down or we’ll release the rest of the information.”

Users of the site have been mostly silent on the breach but some are worried they might lost their standing as top trolls in the community.

“I spent an entire year’s worth of 7th period Graphic Design classes building my rep on sites like IGN and Gamespot, “said an anonymous ZeldaAran user. “I am feared by most of the Nintendo fans there and I shudder to think what might happen if it gets out that I like Nintendo games too.”

UPDATE: A 20-page addendum to the manifesto has been posted stating the reason for the hack:

“Nintendo fans have been unfriended for too long. Unless these secret Nintendo fans want to come out of the closet and openly friend us, we will do it for them.”


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Homophobic Taunt Options Tied To Player Personality In New Rust Update


Homphobic Taunts are now available in Rust (but only for admins during testing). When the taunts do go fully live it won’t be as a “pick your stance” option. Instead you’ll have your taunts permanently assigned to you based on your personality. It’s the same deal with how racist taunts are assigned in the game. Penis size is also permanently assigned but that is handled separately by a “compensation” algorithm.

As developer Garry Newman says via the dev blog:

“To clear up some confusion, when we it does go live you won’t get a choice of whether you’re racist or homophobic. We’re not ‘taking the choice away’ from you. You never had a choice. If in real life you are afraid of gays or think other races are bad then the game reflects that.”

This latest update has brought a number of other options too, including YouTube comments integration. The comments which are part of that system will be purely cosmetic and will show up as tattoos on your character. Eventually the developers might introduce a signage option to allow players to post their most hateful YouTube comments as a sign on their radioactive lawn. The company is accepting player feedback on the idea via recorded swatting calls.

Besides the usual bug fixes and weapon balancing the blog also mentions hate speech volume management:

“This week I finally finished up the first real pass at hate speech volume management. You’ll hear n-words and f-words echoing down long hallways, and some slurs will be louder than others. Things like anti-semitism volume levels and the thresholds that we switch between different race-baiting yells will probably need a bit of tuning still, but I’m pretty happy with where we’re at so far, especially in regards to homophobia.”

Rust is currently in Early Access on Steam. The game doesn’t have a firm release date for a 1.0 version but players are encouraged to keep buying the game just in case it eventually gets one.


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California City Denies Popular Arcade Permit Citing Fears Of Alien Soldier Draft


Power-Up Arcade, a popular arcade in Acton, CA has been denied a permit for a new location by the city council. Members of the council cited concerns of an alien defense force recruiting the younger population.

“I’ve watched these young boys play these arcade games and they are good,” said Louis Rogan, a city council member. “I don’t want some alien force using these games as a way to recruit our children to fight for their armies in some far off interstellar war.”

Over fifty community members who live in a local trailer park showed up to fight for the arcade but a few were convinced by Rogan to pull their support. “Louis is right,” said Jane Rogan, local trailer park member and mother of Louis. “I’ve already had one of my boys taken from me and I refuse to stand by while the rest of our town is sucked up by these Rylans who can’t fight their own intergalactic battles.”

Fred Centauri, owner of the arcade and designer of all the games featured promised that none of his games were alien soldier simulators and that none of their children would be drafted into an alien army.

“Look, I know it looks weird that we only have 5 rows of the same game,” said Centauri. “But I promise you, we – I mean I – am not using these games as a recruiting tool.”


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Creator Of Papyrus Font Donates $1 Million To Shenmue III Kickstarter


Chris Costello, the creator of the Papyrus font, donated $1 million to the Shenmue III Kickstarter this week in hopes that the Shenmue III team will use his classic font for the logo instead.

“The fonts are so close to each other in looks,” said Costello. “Honestly, it was either this or a lawsuit and my lawyers were out of town.”

Costello even went to the trouble of making a mock-up of the title screen. “I spent a good day and a half working on this title screen using my legendary font and my legendary illustration and typography skills.”


Alternate Shenmue III logo created by Costello using his famous Papyrus font

Yu Suzuki, the mastermind behind the Shenmue series has yet to comment on the donation request but Costello is optimistic.

“I’ve been doing this shit for a long time now. I’m a fucking legend. I don’t get why no one will return my calls. It’s not my fault people use Papyrus for  all their shitty greek restaurant menus. I created it specifically for my ancient script fetish and for stuff like the Shenmue cover. I haven’t heard from him yet, but I’m sure Suzuki will be very appreciative and return the favor in kind.”

Shenmue III has been tentatively scheduled for a December 2017 release and will be available for PC and PS4. The game will come packaged with an Apple Pay-equipped coin slot controller adapter that will let you use real-life money to purchase your capsule toys in-game.


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Konami Distancing Itself From Metal Gear Creator On New Box Art


In a move seen to be the final nail in the coffin of Hideo Kojima’s involvement in the Metal Gear series, Konami has altered the box art for Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain to remove mention of the game’s creator.

The current artwork says “Definitely Not a Hideo Kojima Game” and the Kojima Productions logo has been obscured by a no symbol. Earlier versions included an unobscured logo and the headline minus the “Definitely Not” part.

In March, Konami changed all mentions of Kojima to the opposite form. For instance, the credits for Metal Gear Solid’s first entry were changed to “Not Directed by Hideo Kojima” and “Not Written by Hideo Kojima.” The company also convinced WARP to change the credits for its game D2 to say “No Thanks: Hideo Kojima.” The company has also cancelled all future Kojima productions as well as all past productions, retroactively.

Video game speculators are guessing that Konami is backing out of console gaming and that this is one reason for the move. In May, Konami commissioned 80s band Frankie Goes to Hollywood to write a revised version of their Relax hit to say, “Relax, don’t do it, when you want to play it, do it.” The band recorded a performance of the song and posted it to YouTube. The video has now become known for its completely confusing lyrics change and for being the least commented on video in the history of YouTube when the only commenter deleted their comment and a glitch caused the website to count it as -1 comment.

Metal Gear Solid 5: The Phantom Pain launches Sept. 1 on PlayStation 3, PlayStation 4, Windows PC, Xbox 360 and Xbox One. Fans can purchase the game by going to a store and asking a worker to retrieve it for them behind an impenetrable glass fortress.

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